I love you ........................... this big

I know I’m still young

But, I know how I feel

I might not have too much experience

But, I know when love is real.

By the way my heart starts pounding

When I look into your eyes

I might look a little silly

Standing with my arms stretched open wide.

I love you this big

Eyes have never seen… this big

No-one’s ever dreamed… this big

And I’ll spend the rest of my life

Explaining what words cannot describe but, I’ll try

I love you this big

I’ll love you to the moon and back

I’ll love you all the time

Deeper than the ocean

And higher than the pines.

Cause girl, you do something to me

Deep down in my heart

I know I look a little crazy

Standing with my arms stretched all apart.

I love you this big

Eyes have never seen… this big

No-one’s ever dreamed… this big

And I’ll spend the rest of my life

Explaining what words cannot describe but, I’ll try

I love you this big

So much bigger than I ever dreamed my heart ever would

I love you this big

And I’d write your name in stars across the sky

If I could, I would

I love you this big

Oh, eyes have never seen… this big

No-one’s ever dreamed… this big

And I’ll spend the rest of my life

Explaining what words cannot describe but, I’ll try

I love you this big

I love you this big

Oh, eyes have never seen… this big

No-one’s ever dreamed… this big

And I’ll spend the rest of my life

Explaining what words cannot describe but, I’ll try

I love you this big

Starry, starry night

Just come inside from having a cup of coffee under my tree, been trying to settle my nerves and find some peace of mind but thats another post anyway as I was comming in I looked up and noticed just how beautiful the sky is tonight and it made me think of one of my favourite songs, so yes you're getting more lyrics today but I thought I'd throw in a pic to ;o)

Vincent (Starry, starry night)

Starry, starry night
Paint your palette blue and grey
Look out on a summer's day
With eyes that know the darkness in my soul
Shadows on the hills
Sketch the trees and daffodils
Catch the breeze and the winter chills
In colours on the snowy linen land

Now I understand
What you tried to say to me
And how you suffered for your sanity
And how you tried to set them free
They would not listen
They did not know how
Perhaps they'll listen now

Starry, starry night
Flaming flowers that brightly blaze
Swirling clouds and violet haze
Reflect in Vincent's eyes of china blue
Colours changing hue
Morning fields of amber grain
Weathered faces lined in pain
Are soothed beneath the artists' loving hand

Now I understand
What you tried to say to me
And how you suffered for your sanity
And how you tried to set them free
They would not listen
They did not know how
Perhaps they'll listen now

For they could not love you
But still your love was true
And when no hope was left inside
On that starry, starry night
You took your life as lovers often do
But I could have told you Vincent
This world was never meant for one as beautiful as you

Like the strangers that you've met
The ragged men in ragged clothes
The silver thorn of bloody rose
Lie crushed and broken on the virgin snow

Now I think I know
What you tried to say to me
And how you suffered for your sanity
And how you tried to set them free
They would not listen
They're not listening still
Perhaps they never will...

Edge of Desire

Young and full of running

Tell me where has that taken me?

Just a great figure eight or a tiny infinity?

Love is really nothing

But a dream that keeps waking me,

For all of my trying

We still end up dying, how can it be?

Don't say a word just come over and lie here with me,

'Cause I'm just about to set fire to everything I see,

I want you so bad, I'll go back on the things I believed,

There I just said it, I'm scared you'll forget about me.

So young and full of running, all the way to the edge of desire

Steady my breathing, silently screaming,

"I have to have you now"

Wired and I'm tired

Think I'll sleep in my clothes on the floor

Maybe this mattress will spin on its axis and find me on yours

Don't say a word just come over and lie here with me

'Cause I'm just about to set fire to everything I see

I want you so bad I'll go back on the things I believe

There I just said it, I'm scared you'll forget about me

Don't say a word just come over and lie here with me

'Cause I'm just about to set fire to everything I see

I want you so bad I'll go back on the things I believe

There I just said it, I'm scared you'll forget about me

A picture of you

Funny, but when I saw this it made me think of you.

And yes, I do have that one thing that is always with me and makes me think of you, it's called my heart ;o)

“Instead of a sign that says

"Do Not Disturb"

I need one that says

"Already Disturbed Proceed With Caution."

Peace . . . . . . . .

*giggle*

Disconnected

Lost and alone, trying desperately to find my way back home to those I love so dearly. .. . .. . .. . .. .

Yes, I do

I believe in you

Amanda Marshall

Somewhere there's a river, looking for a stream
Somewhere there's a dreamer, looking for a dream
Somewhere there's a drifter, trying to find its way
Somewhere someone's waiting to hear somebody say

I believe in you, and I can't even count the ways that
I believe in you, and I want to do is help you to believe in you

Somewhere someone's reaching trying to grab that ring
Somewhere there's a silent voice lerning how to sing
Some of us can't move ahead we're paralized with fear
And everybody's waiting, to hear somebody say

I believe in you, and I can't even count the ways that
I believe in you, and I want to do is help you to believe in you

I believe in you, and I can't even count the ways that
I believe in you, and all I want to do is help you to believe in you

I will hold you up
I will help you stand I will comfort you when you need a friend
I will be the voice that's calling I

I believe in you and I can't even count the ways that
I believe in you and there are just so many ways that
I believe in you and all I want to do is help you to believe in you

Humane humanity

One of Albert Schweitzer's last statements was quoted as: "The destiny of man is to be more and more human." He was mistaken. The destiny of man is to become progressively less human and more humane, less compulsive and more creative, less instinctive and more intuitive, less material and more spiritual. Man's destiny is to always become more fully divine.

~Gordon Tibbles

Lost and directionless,

Don't get me wrong, I know exactly what I need to do and where I need to be, its just the getting there that has me stumped today . . . . . . . . . . .

So, I was wondering. . . . .

. . . . . does ANYONE know a professional knot untie'r? ? ?
Cause that previously mentioned stupid is now just moments away :/

Tied up in

This is how my innards feel today, cept there are a hundred million knots and it's really no fun anymore. Need to find my disconnect and fast or I'm liable to do something very, very stupid. . . . . . . . .

Inner Strength

It takes more courage to reveal insecurities

than to hide them,

more strength to relate to people

than to dominate them,

more 'manhood' to abide by thought-out principles

rather than blind reflex.

Toughness is in the soul and spirit,

not in muscles and an immature mind.

~ Alex Karras

Taken by surprise

It's come to my attention again with a BANG that no matter how long you've known someone or how well you think you know them, you're probably wrong.

Yep, I spent time alone with a friend of more years than I care to admit over the weekend and was pleasantly surprised to learn that we have FAR more in common in more ways than I would have ever even have dared to guessed.

Between you and me I'm looking forward to spending more time with this friend exploring these common interests. Who knows where this could end up going but I have a feeling it's going to be interesting finding out and if nothing else there is going to be some serious laughter and probably some more learning what more could I ask for . . . . . .

Never stop learning

There is divine beauty in learning, just as there is human beauty in tolerance. To learn means to accept the postulate that life did not begin at my birth. Others have been here before me, and I walk in their footsteps. The books I have read were composed by generations of fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, teachers and disciples. I am the sum total of their experiences, their quests. And so are you.

~Elie Wiesel

~*~

The Universe is one great kindergarten for man. Everything that exists has brought with it its own peculiar lesson. The mountain teaches stability and grandeur; the ocean immensity and change. Forests, lakes, and rivers, clouds and winds, stars and flowers, stupendous glaciers and crystal snowflakes, - every form of animate or inanimate existence, leaves its impress upon the soul of man. Even the bee and ant have brought their little lessons of industry and economy.

~Orison Swett Marden

Love this pain

She's no good for me

I know that she's a wild flower

She's got a restlessness

A beautifulness, a thing about her

But here I am again calling her back

Letting her drive me crazy

It's like I love this pain a little too much

Love my heart all busted up

Something 'bout her, we just don't work

But I can't walk away

It's like I love this pain

It's just an on again

And off again situation

It's just striking a match

A tank of gas combination

But here I am again lighting it up

Knowing that she'll just burn me

It's like I love this pain a little too much

Love my heart all busted up

Something 'bout her, we just don't work

But I can't walk away

It's like I love this pain

It's like I love this life

When nothing's right, yeah something's wrong

It's like I'm just not me

If I can't be a sad, sad song

It's like I love this pain a little too much

Love my heart all busted up

Something 'bout her, we just don't work

But I can't walk away

It's like I love this pain

Oh yeah, it's like I love this pain

I can't walk away, oh no

It's like I love this pain

Maybe I'm

Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way You Love Me All The Time
Maybe I'm Afraid Of The Way I Love You
Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way You Pulled Me Out Of Time
And Hung Me On A Line
Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way I Really Need You


Maybe I'm A Girl And Maybe I'm A Lonely Girl
Who's In The Middle Of Something
That She Doesn't Really Understand

Maybe I'm A Girl And Maybe You're The Only Man
Who Could Ever Help Me
Baby Won't You Help Me Understand

Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way You're With Me All The Time
Maybe I'm Afraid Of The Way I Leave You
Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way You Help Me Sing My Song
Right Me When I'm Wrong
Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way I Really Need You


Maybe I'm A Girl And Maybe I'm A Lonely Girl
Who's In The Middle Of Something
That She Doesn't Really Understand

Maybe I'm A Girl And Maybe You're The Only Man
Who Could Ever Help Me
Baby Won't You Help Me Understand

Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way You're With Me All The Time
Maybe I'm Afraid Of The Way I Leave You
Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way You Help Me Sing My Song
Right Me When I'm Wrong
Maybe I'm Amazed At The Way I Really Need You

Pretty much how I feel today :/

Terror

I can remember years ago when my brother was 4 or 5 there was a series of nights when he would wake up screaming for no apparent reason after which he wouldn't settle no matter what tricks my parents tried. After a while my grandmother in all her wisdom called these episodes "night terrors" not your usual run of the mill nightmare, it seems because he seemed to settle after these, these were far worse apparently and scared him in to not sleeping.

Now you're probably wondering where this walk down memory lane is going and yes it actually does have a point.

You see for the last 10 days or so I've had this overwhelming sense of I HAVE to do something and it needs to be done now before its to late.
Call it a gut feel, call it intuition actually I don't rightly know what to call it except to say its overwhelming every moment of my day now, to the extent that panic set in yesterday.
I'm not sleeping, I'm barely eating. I'm crying all the time for no reason and I am totally at my wits end. I've had these gut feels before, actually they're regular occurrences and normally they pass when I've done what I need to or in a day or 2 if I ignore it but this time.
Not so, this time its getting more intense, more urgent, scarier and yes now I'm terrified.
It's this constant, its with me day and night and I'm really freaking out because what I HAVE to do I can't. It's one of those complicated things where if I do what I HAVE to it is could to have consequences that could spiral out of control and will most likely change things and I'm not sure I should be the catalyst.

Anyway I was just wondering if my brothers night terrors all those years ago felt anything like what I'm feeling now because I sure as heck don't want to fall asleep.

I would if I could

I tried to post these yesterday but blogger ate my post :( so I thought I'd try again tonight

Fix The World Up For You

I can tell you now
When I'm here to listen
To what I've got to say
All my words unplanned
Just like us they are waiting
To come together
I don't know if we're ready to take our train

But I, oh I, I'm gonna fix this world up for you
I'll try, I'll try to build it all around you
You'll never gonna have to be alone
You'll always know you got someone
To fix the world up for you

Well I'll bet I'll get it wrong
More times that I get it right
And I won't even realize it
But I've been doing all I can
To stop you falling
Even now I'm holding my breath for you

But you don't know, you don't know
That I'm ready to hold you now, hold you now

I, oh I, I'm gonna fix this world up for you
I'll try, I'll try to build it all around you
You'll never gonna have to be alone
Yeah you'll alway now you got someone
To fix the world up for you

Gonna fix the world up, up for you
Gonna fix the world up, up for you
Gonna fix the world up, up for you

Fix The World Up For You

I can tell you now
When I'm here to listen
To what I've got to say
All my words unplanned
Just like us they are waiting
To come together
I don't know if we're ready to take our train

But I, oh I, I'm gonna fix this world up for you
I'll try, I'll try to build it all around you
You're never gonna have to be alone
You'll always know you got someone
To fix the world up for you

Well I'll bet I'll get it wrong
More times that I get it right
And I won't even realize it
But I've been doing all I can
To stop you falling
Even now I'm holding my breath for you

But you don't know, you don't know
That I'm ready to hold you now, hold you now

I, oh I, I'm gonna fix this world up for you
I'll try, I'll try to build it all around you
You'll never gonna have to be alone
Yeah you'll alway now you got someone
To fix the world up for you

Gonna fix the world up, up for you
Gonna fix the world up, up for you
Gonna fix the world up, up for you

Simple, random truth. . . . . . .

Our job this day is to become part of the answer to the world's immense and protracted suffering rather than continuing our ancient task of being part of the difficulty.

~Hugh Prather

Shall we ? ? ?

Lay your body down

I've spent my life waiting

For that famous final scene

I believe you know the one

When she falls in love with me

As for you, you've been fakin' your smile

Fillin' your time

on small talk

And cheap wine

Knowing in your heart there was someplace

That you'd rather be

So right or wrong,

I wrote you this song

To tell you how I feel

Don't put up no fight

You just turn off the lights

Walk over here to me

And lay your body down on me

Down on me, tonight, oh yeah

Oh, let your tears fall down on me

Down on me, tonight, oh yeah

As for me I've lied to, denied to

fought with, and tried to

apologize for all my ways

To all the women who were fool enough to fall

in love with me

You played your role

like a movie

Got your lines of who is,

who was, who would be

Somehow you lost track

While real love slipped away, yeah

So for tonight, just turn off the lights

And let those real feelings show

There's no wrong or right

but until you try

you're never gonna know

And lay your body down on me

Down on me, tonight, oh yeah

Oh, let your tears fall down on me

Down on me, tonight, oh yeah

Before you was mine

I was so lonely

Ain't it a shame

Your heart must feel pain

before you can get back on your feet again

So let's draw the blinds

Forget wasted time

And let them old demons die

Take a hold of my hand

Then you'd understand

Why love's worth one more try

And lay your body down on me

Down on me, tonight, oh yeah

Oh, let your tears fall down on me

Down on me, tonight, oh yeah